Paternity DNA testing

One of nuisances with gestational surrogacy for same-sex married couples is the lack of legal uniformity. In the US, when a legally married couple has a child, they are both automatically presumed to be the legal parents of the child. However, it only applies to heterosexual couples mostly, even in many states where same-sex marriage is legal. If we didn't have a pre-birth court order to establish our parentage, S and her husband (both without any biological linkage to the babies) would presumably be the legal parents and their names would be on the babies' birth certificate. No question will be asked.

Although S resides in a state where same-sex marriage became legal a few months ago, our marriage is still not as equal as heterosexual marriages in the case of birth certificate. Under the state code, we can only have the biological father's name on the birth certificate. Because our babies have different biological dads, we need to do paternity DNA testing to prove our biological link to each baby so that birth certificate can be issued accordingly. It will be a certificate of only one biological parent for one baby. In other words, neither one of us has legal custody of both babies. Our marriage has no relevance and means nothing in that state. We will have to adopt each other's baby after we return to our state. Then, our family will be legally protected everywhere in the US with the adoption paper. If we are truly equal as a married couple, both of our names would be on our babies' birth certificates as legal parents just like all married heterosexual couples and a pre-birth order of parentage should suffice. Last month, a married lesbian couple in Indiana sued the state for a similar matter on the birth certificate so that they can have their names on their son's birth certificate. It just shows that marriage equality still needs some progress.

For those same-sex couples considering gestational surrogacy, the laws are murky. Do thoroughly check the state laws where you live and where the surrogate lives and will deliver the baby. It will have a significant impact on parental rights. Having said that, we are optimistic that things will get better in the near future and soon our family will be just as equal as everyone's.

Okay, my rant is over! Moving on.....

We had an appointment with the first pediatrician yesterday. It was a fun and informative visit. Everyone was very excited and welcoming. They all can't wait to meet our baby girls. We have two more appointments to go.

Tomorrow is a BIG Amazon delivery day! 58 items from our baby registry are on their way. It is unbelievable how much our baby girls will have!