February 28 was the date for medical screening and psychological evaluation at the fertility clinic. It was the day we all met for the first time and looked forward to because finally the process was moving forward. Prior to that, "S" has gotten an approval from our fertility doctor after reviewing her medical records. We had actually thought about meeting any potential surrogate in person before making any final decision but our interactions by emails and phones with "S" proved it unnecessary. We were very comfortable and felt confident with her, We invited her and her family to stay at our home during their visit for the screening so we could spend more quality time together.
It was a long drive for them and close to midnight when they arrived. When we met, the connection was instantly there and they just felt like long lost family members. We could not be more excited to meet and welcome them to our home.
The day at the clinic was packed with schedules for all of us. We were seen separately by the doctor, the psychologist, and the nurse. Husband and I have consulted with the clinic a few times before and were really eager and anxious to hear what these professionals had to say about our independent match. A few hours went by and everything seemed to be moving smoothly. "S" had to take a computerized psychological testing with a few hundred questions. According to her, some questions were just silly. In the end, the psychologist confirmed that we matched well and didn't even need a group consultation. The doctor gave us a thumb up. We were given a green light to proceed and could not be more excited.
Over the weekend we got to spend time together and tour the city. It was a perfect opportunity to get to know each other. We enjoyed every moment of it and knew we were in for a long lasting relationship.
On a side note, our doctor requested that we performed a home study on "S" and her family by a social worker after the screening. While we understood the reason for it, we didn't think it was necessary for three reasons, 1) home study should have been done before bringing them for medical and psychological screening, 2) it added extra cost and delayed the process and 3) most importantly, we had seen first hand how they interacted with their kids and each other for a few days. However, our doc simply could not be convinced and insisted to have such study before proceeding. In the end, we did one to comply and it added nothing more to our confidence on "S". It was such a waste of money and time!
Another common practice is background check which we didn't do. It doesn't mean it is not important. It's just not needed for us because of our professions.
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